I've always felt empty and incomplete. I don't feel love for anyone. I don't love my friends or family, and have never fallen in love. All I feel is sadness, anxiety and dullness. Why don't I feel love?

I know exactly what you feel. I‘ve been there, I still am there.

I haven‘t been really lucky in love. I like to say even in life.

I have tried to move forwards several times but I failed because my body is holding me back. I don‘t have any physical impairments nor any obvious disease though. I‘m still young (21). Sometimes I just can‘t eat because I get sick. This leads to serious signs of malnourishment. So I become tired or my body just shows exhaustment by panic symptoms like nausea, dizziness, heart racing. Just general exhaustment.

I feel empty now because I gave up. I don‘t trust my body an

I know exactly what you feel. I‘ve been there, I still am there.

I haven‘t been really lucky in love. I like to say even in life.

I have tried to move forwards several times but I failed because my body is holding me back. I don‘t have any physical impairments nor any obvious disease though. I‘m still young (21). Sometimes I just can‘t eat because I get sick. This leads to serious signs of malnourishment. So I become tired or my body just shows exhaustment by panic symptoms like nausea, dizziness, heart racing. Just general exhaustment.

I feel empty now because I gave up. I don‘t trust my body anymore, I don‘t have faith in anyone to be able to help me.

I guess you lost faith somewhere, and/or trust. In you, to be lovable and able to love.

All you need is someone or something to prove you wrong. And trust me there will be someone.

I can‘t really help you more since I don‘t know how to get out of this at the moment. I got saved once though, I fell in love, and it was beautiful. My life got better very fast. It didn‘t work though and now I‘m back, sadly.

All I want you to know is that if this is impairing your life, you need to get help, professional help. If you start thinking about „I don‘t want to live anymore“ you‘ll need someone who supports you. If no one does it, you‘ll need someone who does it as a job.

I never was suicidal so don‘t worry about me. I still believe I‘m strong. I‘ll get through this some day. And you will too. It might require a lot of time though.

For now, try to open up a bit more, express your feelings more. I‘m sure you have them, I know you have them. You‘re keeping them inside because you‘re afraid of them.

It‘s time to let go. It‘s time to let it out.

Those feelings that we are missing, are within.

Feeling detached, there are likely all kinds of emotions that we are neglecting. Bubbling beneath the surface, they may be contributing to our feelings of anxiety.

We are healthiest when we can notice all of our feelings. They need to see the light, but not all at once. There may be important reasons why they are buried, and they must be handled with care.

It is uncomfortable to feel a dullness. Therapy is not an easy project, as it will require real work. Please be hopeful and inquisitive, and open to the process.The decision to begin is an investm

Those feelings that we are missing, are within.

Feeling detached, there are likely all kinds of emotions that we are neglecting. Bubbling beneath the surface, they may be contributing to our feelings of anxiety.

We are healthiest when we can notice all of our feelings. They need to see the light, but not all at once. There may be important reasons why they are buried, and they must be handled with care.

It is uncomfortable to feel a dullness. Therapy is not an easy project, as it will require real work. Please be hopeful and inquisitive, and open to the process.The decision to begin is an investment in our future.

This story can be edited, rewritten to include hope and optimism.

Firstly let me say how sorry it makes me to hear you feel like this. It's sounds almost as if the fire of life has been all but extinguished bar a tiny amber. It's that tiny amber however that you must nurture and help in order to reignite your lust for life.

Meaning no matter how small is your first step. Yes you might have been hurt or rejected. Almost everyone is at some point but to allow that consume you so you're almost a victim is not the answer. Being a victim only reasserts your belief that someone else is to blame or responsible for how you feel. You must be honest with yourself, work

Firstly let me say how sorry it makes me to hear you feel like this. It's sounds almost as if the fire of life has been all but extinguished bar a tiny amber. It's that tiny amber however that you must nurture and help in order to reignite your lust for life.

Meaning no matter how small is your first step. Yes you might have been hurt or rejected. Almost everyone is at some point but to allow that consume you so you're almost a victim is not the answer. Being a victim only reasserts your belief that someone else is to blame or responsible for how you feel. You must be honest with yourself, work hard on yourself to see good no matter how minute in everyone and thing you encounter. Meaning is the key, taking a walk looking around breathing the air small things that you must begin to value in order to take the first steps in fanning that amber.

I wish you all the best

There are many possibilities, most of which require medical evaluation. Even if none turn out to be the cause of your difficulty, you will have some comfort in knowing what the problem is not.

Autism, including Asperger's, can be treated.

Depression, which needs treatment. It can be serious, and lead to suicide.

There are many others, which can also be serious. Get medical evaluation.

The one and only solution is that you have to love yourself first.

I would suggest that the only way to do this is through therapy. It is a very hard problem to overcome. Therapy is necessary because even if you do find someone and fall in love, it is likely that doubts about yourself or your partner will re-emerge and affect you relationship. So get help!

I think you have to deal with it. Just find a good therapist and I believe he/she will help you.

I'm also responding anonymously, but I won't apologize. In fact, I'd venture to say the previous respondent wasn't "sorry" either. But I think if I were making the specific details of ANY medical condition public, I would do so anonymously.

Whatever you want to call me, I've been diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Personality Disorder NOS, Mood Disorder due to TBI, and, biologically speaking, a large portion of my Orbitofrontal and Prefrontal cortex are literally dead due to massive internal hemorrhages I suffered from an accident in my youth (the

I'm also responding anonymously, but I won't apologize. In fact, I'd venture to say the previous respondent wasn't "sorry" either. But I think if I were making the specific details of ANY medical condition public, I would do so anonymously.

Whatever you want to call me, I've been diagnosed with Antisocial Personality Disorder, Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Personality Disorder NOS, Mood Disorder due to TBI, and, biologically speaking, a large portion of my Orbitofrontal and Prefrontal cortex are literally dead due to massive internal hemorrhages I suffered from an accident in my youth (these are the parts of your brain that. among other things, handle emotions, personality, morality, learning from mistakes, impulsivity, agression etc., and in which numerous studies have shown socio/psychopaths have substantial abnormalities).

First I looked up the word. "Love." It's a noun, meaning it's a thing. That thing is defined by Webster's as "a feeling of strong or constant affection for a person." So let's look at this more closely so we have a full understanding of the question, "What does it FEEL like to be UNABLE to FEEL LOVE?"

Feeling: "an emotional state or reaction" (Emotion: "a conscious mental reaction (as anger or fear) subjectively experienced as strong feeling usually directed toward a specific object and typically accompanied by physiological and behavioral changes in the body")

Affection: "a moderate feeling or emotion"

You can rearrange all these words and meanings like a Rubik's Cube. It's a strong feeling of feeling towards something. Obviously there is a lot of room for personal interpretation here. Glad we cleared that up.

One other thing I want to look into the etymology of here is, "Unable." They made it pretty easy, it just means, "not able to do something." Not able to "do" something? Do: "to bring to pass" "perform/execute." Maybe some will disagree with me, but if anyone was "able" to "perform or execute" their "feelings," that would be pretty weird. It would mean that you could go from legitimately crying your eyes out because you are in emotional pain from the loss of a loved one, to laughing and chatting about that funny cat video on YouTube, without suppression. The "emotions" you were feeling would literally be gone if you were "able to feel."

So before I get to the question, let's just make it clear that no one is "able" to feel love. People feel love or they don't, it's not a skill or ability. And as I've already shown, love really has no definition other than a strong feeling toward someone. Anything else you can find on love is only talking about actions (when you love someone, you treat them this way or do these things for them or listen to their feelings or make sacrifices for them, etc. etc). You don't have to "love" someone to do things for them. In fact, many people do those kinds of things for people they end up realizing they only "thought they loved." Actions can come from love, but they do not define them.

So to answer (I'm ready now):

I'm happy I have the feelings I have, and if someone were to say that my feelings, or what I call love isn't really love, I wouldn't really care. I have my reasons for including people in my life, and you have yours. And if people you want in your life are in your life, then obviously they're cool with it, whatever your reasons are. Keep up the good work.

If fondness means just valuing certain people above others, then yes certainly. I'm fond of people I have a good time with, who can hold stimulating conversation, who have similar interests with. I also admire those who have traits that I desire and aspire to have, or who represent something important to me.

As far as concern for others, I'm going to assume you mean empathy. I can be concerned about people, how or what they're doing, etc. for many different reasons, but if you mean out of sheer empathy for them, then the answer would be no. I have found this to be a non-issue, as I usually arrive at the same conclusions and decisions for logical reasons as most others do for emotional ones. Additionally, I have noticed that the differences between my decisions made out of logical concern, and those made out of other's empathy, are generally better ones.

I'm not really going to get into the sexual question because it's really vague. There's physical sex and there's "making love" and I don't know what exactly you mean by "sexual attraction."

Finally, I do not feel I follow any code, personally. I follow what I follow, and that is determined by what is most advantageous for me. Sometimes following the "rules" is best, but the fact that "Those are the rules" is not a concern of mine. I have to add though that impulsivity is an issue with my condition, so sometimes what I think is in my best interest is way, way off, and if what I thought was best involved breaking the rules, then I end up paying the consequences (sometimes..).

Thanks for the question, it was fun answering.

For those who are paying attention - science has known for quite a while ( research started in earnest after WW II ) that the bond between mother & child “takes” as a result of some pretty specific interactions. A lot of the “medicalization” and “consumerization” of maternity & motherhood tends to work against forming this bond. ( other things can interfere too - poverty, drugs, etc… )

In our crazy world it is quite normal for the mother / child bond to be poorly formed or not to form at all. Social convention & peer pressure help to disguise this fact, leading both parties to this “non-bond” t

For those who are paying attention - science has known for quite a while ( research started in earnest after WW II ) that the bond between mother & child “takes” as a result of some pretty specific interactions. A lot of the “medicalization” and “consumerization” of maternity & motherhood tends to work against forming this bond. ( other things can interfere too - poverty, drugs, etc… )

In our crazy world it is quite normal for the mother / child bond to be poorly formed or not to form at all. Social convention & peer pressure help to disguise this fact, leading both parties to this “non-bond” to fake it. In some families the faking “doesn’t take” and so you end up with kids that know they are not actually loved.

The odds are, this is your situation. It is mine. I grew up thinking that this family love thing was all a lie - that it was an oxymoron. Almost all of the people I’ve known really well are in this situation - it accounts for a huge percentage of counselling. In fact, I have only recently come to believe that some families are in fact different and “motherly love” is real. However, those folks are in a small minority. The majority live with “pretend love” and a few of us actually know where we stand.

I actually see benefits to it. My parents did not love us - but they also did not go “freaky emotional” on us for doing things wrong. My mother acted like a decent friend, answering questions honestly - for example - any questions. In grade seven I knew more of the real facts about sex & STD’s for example than my teachers. ( I had no idea what stuff looked like or “how” one did things, but I knew what parts were involved and “where they went”. My parents never hit me or lied to me about anything. How many can say that. Shit, I even broke the clutch in Dad’s car and was not punished. ( I did have to help put the new one in though… )

Interestingly, though, I do NOT have trouble experiencing love as an adult. In fact, if I have a fault in this area at all, it might be that I tend to fall in love too easily - a fairly common responses to a childhood like mine. Of course another common response is to be overly insular and not fall in love at all. So, if you are in your teens or 20’s - you might turn out like me and have a great ( if erratic ) love life. Or you might not. If you are over 40 and still have not found love - you probably aren’t able and so never will - however life can still be good and you can have relationships - they just won’t have such a strong emotional effect. Mind you - you might just have not met that right person.

Anyway - life can be good without love as long as you find some other way to have purpose. Good luck.

Most people who feel connected with others have two reasons to do so:

1- it maybe because of there expectations from others or maybe there dependency on people.

The majority in this world connects through this concept often without realising it until the expectations are broken or when somebody deserts you of their support.

Now trust me when I say u don't wanna be this type of person. He/she is selfish and is only there for you, has feelings for you, up until u have feelings for them, up until u are there for them, they will most probably abandon u when u don't fit there idea of life or people or

Most people who feel connected with others have two reasons to do so:

1- it maybe because of there expectations from others or maybe there dependency on people.

The majority in this world connects through this concept often without realising it until the expectations are broken or when somebody deserts you of their support.

Now trust me when I say u don't wanna be this type of person. He/she is selfish and is only there for you, has feelings for you, up until u have feelings for them, up until u are there for them, they will most probably abandon u when u don't fit there idea of life or people or when u don't stand up to there expectations.

2-the second type of person is the empathetic one these are the real kind innocent hearts who are really actually able to connect with other people.

Now the thing about these people is that they love without expecting anything in return not even a thanks and trust me they are out there they help out of pure understanding. It is true being such a person is hard in this world, but nobody in this world is born this way, it takes experience patience and realisation to be this person.

What is empathy? It is the ability to put yourself in someone's else's shoes walk in them and then using your mind helping them. When u are this type of person the hurt will be no more there cause no expectations are broken. There will be no pride and agony cause u know that u aren’t any pure.that u have made mistakes to and it's okay to do so up until u are learning from them.

In the end I would like to clarify one more thing that there is no scientific term for this kind of attitude (at least not in my knowledge). Being empathetic is simply being more of a human.

Lastly, if u ever find ur self alone and emotionless. Trust me it's okay. Just remind ur self that u are not alone, there are people out there who have suffered worse and are still suffering. Just try squeezing ur self into somebody else's shoes even if they don’t fit

These are not your friends for starters.

Friends is a word that I've had the privilege of understanding since I was young. It's a lot like the term love. People believe they understand it, but they don't — they mix the terms up for ones that they should be using like acquaintance or lust.

Secondly, this may seem difficult and is; life is going to hand you people who come and go.

Realize this. (Be consciously aware of this).

I mean this in respect, otherwise I wouldn't bother messaging you. It's not important how long these new people stay in your immediate circle, what is important is that you tak

These are not your friends for starters.

Friends is a word that I've had the privilege of understanding since I was young. It's a lot like the term love. People believe they understand it, but they don't — they mix the terms up for ones that they should be using like acquaintance or lust.

Secondly, this may seem difficult and is; life is going to hand you people who come and go.

Realize this. (Be consciously aware of this).

I mean this in respect, otherwise I wouldn't bother messaging you. It's not important how long these new people stay in your immediate circle, what is important is that you take value from the experience(s).

For instance, I would not be communicating to you if you did not have “said-above” occur. You most likely would not have created a message like such, and I wouldn't have reason to answer.

They left to pursue material items, as you stated, you know what's important. Don't waste your time being blindfolded by such mishap. Your life has meaning and you are aware of it.

In most cases these types of people branch off to look for something else, but this isn't about them. Every seven years or so it becomes time for an individual to grow more and stop being complacent. Here you are.

You have reached a point in which nature/natural order of things (or whatever) has given you a clearing. It has removed what once weighed you down. Take this opportunity to work upon yourself. (Trust in the fact that this is a gift, not a curse).

As time (this won't take long) progresses, those around you are likely to take notice. Use your already intuitive nature and hand pick, with a clear mind, who you want in your life (or back in your life, if that comes to pass).

You can now clearly reassess and readapt — you.

*or you could just ignore this mindless yammering from some anonymous person online. The choice is ultimately yours.

Backstory:

I write this, after witnessing a friend who's girlfriend (after 4 years) left him and kicked him out. He tried desperately to make her happy, but fell short almost everyday.

He was working for a local fast food shop. Had little cash to his name. Needless to say life, up to that point was not the best, nor was he prepared for such a blow.

He now, just a year and a half later, works at an established bank as a Teller. Soon to be promoted if he remains there. He's learning and improving his skill set with each passing day, which he applies to his newly created/owned business.

He just needed the weeds cleared from the path…

I hope you weren't absent of these emotional for your entire life.

“Psychopathic” is exactly how some would diagnose what it is you are “not feeling”. But to qualify that, you would also have to have no compunction perpetrating hurt or pain on those to hose that you are supposed to “love” but “cannot feel love” for.

It would be irresponsible for you to take too much stock from non license head people like psychologists, therapists or psychiatrists. Even a social worker or counsele who had time to spend and discuss this with you in person.

Unless you want your privacy exposed here on Quora, I sugg

I hope you weren't absent of these emotional for your entire life.

“Psychopathic” is exactly how some would diagnose what it is you are “not feeling”. But to qualify that, you would also have to have no compunction perpetrating hurt or pain on those to hose that you are supposed to “love” but “cannot feel love” for.

It would be irresponsible for you to take too much stock from non license head people like psychologists, therapists or psychiatrists. Even a social worker or counsele who had time to spend and discuss this with you in person.

Unless you want your privacy exposed here on Quora, I suggest you seek help for this “rut” of very unmatched human and spiritual connection you are missing from people who are vested in you.

If you can FUNCTION and sever these relationships and feel perfectly content, then there is nothing any stranger can find a leg to stand on make you seek help. You are not committing can't crimes. You goto work and pay your bills.

For those who love you and want you get gain more out of life than armadillos and rattlesnakes, then maybe you might want to pull teether enough will power to try. Stay off social media or people will think you are a serial killer. From me to you, I suggest you see your family and then sever your relationship with your GF and consider how to approach what you want out of existence. If your family clearly loves you and they have earned the right because they raised you and supported you, then donit out of basic courtesy. If not love. Tell them what's happening. If your butdendisnt feel like saving lives today, doesn't that give her an excuse to walk away from a dying patient? Common courtesy and fairness is what you owe to the people who earned.

If your family was abusive or a cause of great trauma, then it's time you skip to “help”